An idea for the G.I.Joe video game we deserve.

I think we can all agree I’d have a better chance of getting Emily Browning to have a chai latte with me then being asked to consult on a G.I.Joe video games, because as much as I claim to be the foremost G.I.Joeologist in the world, G.I.Joe is about as popular these day as Nickleback. Sure you’ll get people who’ll enjoy it, but they wouldn’t call themselves a fan. Considering the best G.I.Joe video game we have right now is a tap game where Snake Eyes beats up red ninjas who throw themselves at him, it’s time as fans to say we demand better.

While the most popular idea would be a Snake Eyes third person hack and slash game like the Deadpool video game that came out some years the idea of havong a silent commando soldier who is also ninja trained be the focal point of your game is a great idea on paper but an interesting story it doesn’t really make. I mean the only sick burns that Snakes Eyes can give is with a flame thrower, which now that I think about it, would be kind of cool. No, the game we want would be an FPS in the vain of Call of Duty.

Before you roll your eyes so hard they fall out of their sockets at the mere mention of Call of Duty, the series had at one point been known for it’s combination of exciting set pieces and for having a good story mode. Modern Warfare 1 for example was a high point in the series for example, having exciting set pieces that didn’t betray a narative. The question is, who shall the game be about and the answer to that is Mercer. For those who don’t know, and judging by G.I.Joe’s popularity means there is a lot of you, Mercer is the only Cobra agent to join the G.I.Joe field team, and while had hadn’t shown up in the Marvel/IDW main book, his presence has been felt in other books and cartoons.

Mercer is the best place to start with regards to story telling, because you can frame it as a story of redemption. The first 5 or so missions would be Mercer working along side say, Major Blood, Blacklight and Firefly, while catching glimpses of Baroness, Destro, Zartan and Cobra Commander. He’d start off as an angry young man who joined Cobra to make a difference in the world, and over the first couple of missions he rises in rank and responsibilities before being asked to stage a war crime and refusing. He’s arrested and comes to the aid of the G.I.Joe soldier Stalker, who is rescued by Scarlett and Snake Eyes and asks to come with them, explaining he knows the layout of the base.

He then asks to work with the Joes, not only as an informant but wants to go on missions with them to prove he’s left Cobra and to cripple them for turning him into a monster. These would take the from of hunting down former Cobra operatives while they’re on their own missions or acts of sabotage, such as destroying Terror Dromes etc. Over the course of the remaining missions you get cameos from famous joes such as Shipwreck, Roadblock and fight along side them while redeeming yourself in your own eyes before becoming a fully fledged member of the Joe team.

The Muliplayer would be fairly robust, with an option of using levels based off classic G.I.Joe locals, such as Castle Destro, The Pitt, either 1,2 or 3 the silent Castle etc. Character skins could be unlocked as you progress up and the DLC practically writes itself. If we are going to get an engaging G.I.Joe game, we could do a lot worse then the idea I’ve put forward. Just as long as it’s not another Battleground, thing could hardly be called a game.


G.I.Joe Deviations

Paul Allor is a fantastic writer. If you don’t believe me, then you should check out G.I.Joe Deviations, in which over the course of 24 pages he tells a complete story set in an alternate world of G.I.Joe where Cobra wins, which makes Cobra Commander go a little stir crazy. The nature of the book is more comedy than action orientated, which isn’t to say it isn’t action packed, but the focus of a lighter tone works a lot better then a gritty end of the world type.  The idea of Destro and the Baroness settling down and having kids is brilliant, as is the idea of having to replace several nannies. I won’t spoil it for anyone except to say you should check it out as it’s perhaps one of the better books out there.

But it does lead to a slightly larger problem. While the book is fantastic, I have to question who it is really written for? The Deviations range is certainly inventive, it’s also a bit baffling because they’re seemingly made for fans of the respective title,s of which there are four other books. That’s okay, but they’re not really user friendly, because unless you have a vested interest in the characters already, you won’t really care if Mulder was abducted by aliens or if Optimus Prime decided that he’d rather not die. To be fair there is a recap page in the cover explaining the series, but I can’t really imagine anyone who isn’t already a G.I.Joe fan walking past it on the shelf and deciding to read it. No matter how great the review is. The same goes for the other books as well. Unless I’m already a fan of the series, I don’t really care how a world would be different if X happened and not Y.

That’s not to say that they’re not any good, because they are and if Paul Allor were to write a G.I.Joe book I’d sign up for that in a heart beat. But seeing as the goal of a comic company is to increase readership of these titles, offering an alternate look into what could’ve been doesn’t really strike me as some thing will bring in new readers, and while the concept is cool, I can’t really see it as a basis for a monthly title.

Streetfighter X G.I.joe review

So the the biggest comics of February has finaly arrived. No, not Aveners the secret of Pleasant Hill or what ever it’s called (Although that is a cracking good tale) no silly, we finally have Streetfighter x G.I.joe arrive. The story itself is pretty sweet, with the reason the tournament is conceived is that Destro can have the ultimate weapon that can only be powered up by one on one fights. While it may not be the best story ever conceived, it does provide a fantastic back drop why they are fighting in the first place. The winner gets access to the weapon, but all things being comics, I suspect some one will cheat meaning the good guys have to team up to stop M. Bison and Destro.

The fights themselves are really cool,visually interesting and are really entertaining. Writher Aubrey Sitterson and artist Emilio Laiso   has exceeded my expections and delivered a ripping good read. The action is broken down into 4 fights for the first two issues, and features comedy gold. Roadblock some where things it’s appropreaite for him to use his 50 calibre machine gun in a martial arts tournament is a pretty funny. The fights never really as go as you think they would, and while you can sort of guess the overall outcome, half the fun is arriving at the end.

The book also features character profiles on the fighters involved and a quick recap for fights they couldn’t show you which is better left for you to read. It isn’t for everyone, and while it’s designed for mostly fans of either franchises, anyone can pick this up and enjoy it. Aubrey Sitterson has done a fantastic job in writing a book that is equal parts welcoming to newcomers as for diehard fans themselves, and if you’re a fan of fighting comics or either franchise then check it out.